-
Jesuits Mandate White Tank Tops And Lots Of Water for Mudstock
April 30, 2025
-
Marathon Runner Revived By Pink Whitney Nip
April 21, 2025
-
LTE: Jesus Ascended? I Thought That Was Girls-Only?
April 20, 2025
-
Barack Obama Added As Introductory Commencement Speaker
April 16, 2025
-
Man Cooks Up ALC Showdown Parlay Following Tragic March Madness Bracket Loss
April 11, 2025
-
Rising Senior Suspiciously, Concerningly, Creepily Excited To Take Freshman Courses
April 10, 2025
-
Pro-Life Club Sponsors Baby Petting Zoo
April 9, 2025
-
10 Tariffs To Be Enacted Over The Next Month
April 8, 2025
-
Phew! Pre-Med Man Has Some Advice For Your Period Cramps!
April 7, 2025
-
Male Feminist Really Wants To Fu-Focus On BC WLAX
April 4, 2025
STAYER HALL — Having spent the past three weeks in a relatively calm state of mind, junior Matthew Angstrom (MCAS ‘18) reported that he was happy to finally reunite with his constant anxiety this week. While admitting that he enjoyed having some time apart from his existential dread during...
Read more
Hello, class. Welcome to your first day of Postcolonial Gender Dynamics In Western Society! As all of you are upperclassmen, I won’t waste time by going over every last sentence on the syllabus—I expect you to have done that on your own time. However, there are a couple of...
Read more
“These snaps are exactly what I needed to prove Brent and Chad wrong!”
Read more
“I’m hoping the team can get together and do some tackling drills in an abandonded automobile factory. What’s better than dudes being dudes, crushing each others skulls among the ruins of American industry?”
Read more
BOSTON COLLEGE — The Heights broke news earlier this evening that President Fr. William P. Leahy, S.J., signed a statement supporting Boston College’s commitment to protecting its undocumented students by holding up President Obama’s executive order, Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA). Because DACA may be in danger of...
Read more
CHESTNUT HILL MALL — Tragedy struck in the wee hours of Friday morning, as Boston College Head Coach Steve Addazio has been taken to the hospital after being trampled at a local Bed Bath & Beyond in a fit of Black Friday-induced violence. Addazio had been camping outside the...
Read more
O’NEILL QUAD — As they passed each other without eye contact or acknowledgement between classes this afternoon, juniors Kelly Jones (CSON ‘18) and Kayla McArthur (MCAS ‘18) breathed a collective sigh of relief, relishing in enjoyment of their mutual disregard for each other. While future trends in human interaction are difficult...
Read more
Welcome to another episode of Pimp My UIS! I’m your host, world-renowned Catholic rapper ever2Xcel, and today we’ve got a university information system that is in serious need of an upgrade! Johnny Manzo is a junior in the Lynch School here at Boston College, and he’s been registering for courses for years...
Read more
RUBENSTEIN HALL — After buttoning the last button of his fine poly-cotton blend shirt at approximately 8:24 p.m. in his Keyes South double, Arnold Pellegrini (MCAS ‘20) was spotted making his way to the Newton bus with a cool, collected confidence that he hadn’t experienced since high school, when...
Read more
MIDDLE CAMPUS — At 11:02AM this morning, senior Bryan McDadderson (MCAS ’17) placed his fingers to keyboard and—uh-oh—thought about posting a Facebook status with his “unique” insight into the 2016 presidential election. While McDadderson reportedly told himself that this behavior was not consistent with his normal online activity, sources...
Read more
Copyright © 2019 The New England Classic, Inc.