The New England Classic
Ultimate Frisbee Teams Throw Pizzas Across Comm. Ave, Receive Crazy Dough’s Sponsorship

After getting the green light from the owner of Dough’s, Roni knew that she needed to get as many hands on deck as possible. She sent a text to Veggie Dude (CSOM ’22), captain of the Men’s Club Ultimate Frisbee team, to ask if his team could offer a few handlers. He was initially skeptical but eventually got on board. “I didn’t want to say yes at first because I knew I’d have a few beers in me, but then I remembered I play almost every club game drunk.”

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Former Fake ID Owners Spend Weekend at Build-a-Bear, Pump It Up

The remaining population of underage juniors have opted for a more dignified and exclusive option: playing in a private room for 2 hours at Pump It Up. Summer B. Irthday (MCAS ’23) explained to The Classic that she is part of the “silent majority” of underage juniors, and repeatedly reiterated that the rug burn on her knees and elbows are “not what you think.”

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Guy Registers Special Little Mod Party Just For Himself

One mod resident who didn’t receive a pick time reported hearing strange sounds throughout the night. “I’d hear, like, Shakira playing and think ‘Oh, he is having a party,’” said Tom Blamigan (LSOE ’22), “but then it’d be followed by the kind of sob that could only come from a grown man. Really guttural stuff. It was tough to listen to.”

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Wait, Do You Guys Actually All Have Fake IDs?

I thought fake ids were a myth – the type of thing you only see in Superbad. Like, it’s literally illegal. I’m a good kid. Sure, I like a good underage drink once in a while but identity theft?!

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Circle Tavern “Edgar Allan Poe Night” Offers Chains, Wine, And Cement Special
THE CIRCLE TAVERN – Upperclassmen perusing Herrd last week were elated to see an advertisement from the Circle Tavern at the top of their page. Thursday’s “Chains, Wine, and Cement Special” drew students in with promises of giveaways, discounted appetizers, and a sampling of a rare drink known only... Read more
BC Marble Spillers And Banana Peelers Club Banned From Marathon
CARNEY HALL—While BC is renowned for uplifting and celebrating its student clubs, OSI has placed restrictions on the “Marble Spillers and Banana Peelers” club. From Sunday, 7 P.M. to Monday, 7 P.M., members of the club are not allowed within 20 feet of Commonwealth Avenue. “It’s a safety risk,”... Read more
Students Storm Field After Beating Newton North 24-20

“We’re confident that that will translate well to this week’s matchup at Clemson. In a lot of ways, Newton North and Clemson have very similar defensive styles.”

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“BC Before Dark” To Offer Sippy Cups For Little Stupid Babies Who Can’t Drink

“For the first time in a long time, I feel seen,” said Smalls Gerber (MCAS ’22)”

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LTE: The Rat Can Still Be A Bar If You Day Drink There
I’ve heard about the glory days of 1978, when The Rat was the most bodacious, tubular joint in town to shake your thing and meet some bitchin’ lads and ladies. Legend says the drinking age was 18, that light beer flowed as though a gift from the gods, and... Read more
University Suspends Three Persons of God for Violating Guest Policy

“After we stuffed the Holy Spirit behind the shower curtain, I tried to explain that we’re Three Persons, One God, so we should be exempt…  they couldn’t seem to grasp the concept. BC is really going to regret doing this. Do they know who my Father is?”

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