Eddie Pess (CSOM ’25) reached out to the Classic to talk about his anxieties and to broadcast his plea to the rest of the student body: “Oh gosh, guys. I sure hope nobody fucks my mom.”
Read more
ICYMI: Kyle Leads 3-Hour Game Of ISpy Hot
Campus CultureStudent LifeWTF September 26, 2022
Kyle began, binoculars in hand: “I spy with my little eye… something green!” obviously referring to the t-shirt of someone in the 3rd row.
Read more
EXCLUSIVE: Kyle’s Leaked Setlist For Stokes Set Hot
WTF September 24, 2022
The investigative journalists at The New England Classic have obtained Kyle’s setlist for Stokes Set.
Read more
Goodbye, Potatoes: BC Dining Gets Rid Of The One Thing Students Like
Big IssuesWTF September 14, 2022
Brak’fousst is not alone. Increasing fury continues to spread among students as their staple breakfast item is M.I.A. But for a measly 2-3 times the past month, the crispy little nugs were replaced by other variations of fried potatoes.
Read more
Baldwin Jr.’s Absence At Saturday’s Game Reveals Links To IRA Faction
Big IssuesWTF September 6, 2022
“A review of Baldwin Jr.’s internet search history broke the news to students that the young eagle harbors sympathy for the paramilitary organization known as the Irish Republican Army, or the IRA.”
Read more
“Even though I’m technically blind, I could have sworn I saw the faint outline of their slender pointed head and thinly furred ears. I couldn’t help but take a bite.”
Read more
Student Next To You In Schiller Lab Keeps 3D Printing Dildos
WTF February 23, 2022
Normous has been observed continuously returning to the 3D printing rooms in the pristine building. It is reported that he has been creating countless phallic sculptures and taking them back to his room. Although he tries to be sneaky in his endeavors, the glass-clad walls surrounding the lab make it hard to do so.
Read more
Roommate’s New Year’s Resolution Seems To Be “Fart More”
Dorm StuffWTF January 24, 2022
“I think these under-thunders are a pretty passive-aggressive way of him asking for more alone time. This man is halfway to a charcuterie plate with all the cheese he’s been cutting. It’s unbelievable.”
Read more
However, after a stroke of inspiration while scooting to his finance class, Speedster has decided to do what no other Boston College Athlete has done: scoot on home for the holidays. “Yeah I mean this bad boy can get me to Playa Bowls and back, why can’t I scoot to Florida?”
Read more