The New England Classic
The New England Classic’s Summer 2020 Vacation Travel Guide: Florida

Boy oh boy, you needed this!

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University Confirms Nicotine Patches To Be Sold At Concessions
YAWKEY ATHLETIC CENTER — In a controversial press release, Boston College Athletic Director Patrick Kraft announced on Saturday that the University had approved the sale of nicotine patches in Alumni Stadium and Conte Forum. The specialty patches, reportedly dubbed “EagleBuzz”, will join the 2018 inclusion of beer and wine... Read more
Freshman Wondering When It Is Safe To Cross Comm Ave
For more gut-wrenching content, check out the email sent by Father Leahy around five on March 11, 2020. Read more
How to Entertain Yourself During Quarantine (Budget Edition)
Hey! Are you back living in your childhood bedroom? Are you a broke college student who is hurting from not being included in the COVID relief bill and rationing money to buy weed from that kid who dropped out of your high school? Are you already sick of your... Read more
Touched By Tragedy: Todd Was Supposed To Be In Barcelona This Weekend
WESTCHESTER COUNTY, NEW YORK — Having returned home more than two months early from his semester abroad in Dublin, Todd Lombardi (CSOM ’21) has reportedly been reminding his family he was “supposed to be in Barcelona this weekend.” The sentiment, while heartfelt, seemingly ignores the push notifications on his... Read more
Mom Can’t Believe You Got Kicked From Housing Group, Thought They Were All Very Nice Boys

Kelly went on to describe the situation as “fucked,” a comment which Mrs. Kelly disapproved of as she “did not raise [him] to use that language.”

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LTE: Uh, Why Is Molly In My Zoom Class?
Like what you see? Stuck at your parents house? Browse our site for more juicy, immunocompromised content! Read more
LTE: I Am The Tiny Door Into Eagles, And There Is No Escape
I should have been an emergency fire exit in Higgins, or a reflection room door on Newton campus. A sane man would have put me anywhere else. Instead, I am the Super Tiny Door Into Eagles.  The tastiest licks in all of BC lie behind my hinges: soup with... Read more
Campus Ministry Begins Individually Plastic-Wrapping Communion Wafers
McELROY COMMONS — The Office of Campus Ministry announced Tuesday morning that effective immediately all eucharistic wafers will be individually wrapped in saran wrap. The statement was communicated to the Boston College community in an email which also included the phrase “care for the whole person” 17 times. “Due... Read more
Fuck Yeah: Kid In Your APPA Group Brought Her Dab Pen
PARKERSBERG, WEST VIRGINIA — Students in APPA group #42 have taken a break from building houses for the impoverished to get REALLY high in the mountains of Appalachia. “Dabs with the bros are what make this experience so worthwhile,” said Eleanor Restucci (CSOM ‘21), referring to her G-Slim 2800... Read more