The New England Classic
OIP Announces New External Program With Galactic Federation

“Not once in four millennia have we encountered a species whose diet consists entirely of carbohydrates and fermented grains, and yet is capable of such emotional overstimulation.”

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Touched By Tragedy: Todd Was Supposed To Be In Barcelona This Weekend
WESTCHESTER COUNTY, NEW YORK — Having returned home more than two months early from his semester abroad in Dublin, Todd Lombardi (CSOM ’21) has reportedly been reminding his family he was “supposed to be in Barcelona this weekend.” The sentiment, while heartfelt, seemingly ignores the push notifications on his... Read more
OP-ED: Whoever Read My OIP Application, I Hope You Study Abroad In Hell

“I wish you the best of luck, as you painstakingly request a copy of your transcript and forward it to Midas, the foul judiciary of Pluto’s wicked court.”

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“¡Ÿó! Whât’š ūp brõ¿” Reports Student Coming Back From Abroad
UNITED STATES — Friends and acquaintances of Linda Wilkins (MCAS ’20) have raised concerns over her “peculiar” new speech habits. Wilkins, who spent the fall semester studying abroad in Barcelona, for some reason started speaking with a nondescript Pan-European accent upon returning to campus. “I saw Linda in the... Read more
Setting the World Aflame? This Abroad Student Just Set a Bar on Fire
PARMA, ITALY — A Boston College student studying abroad at the University of Parma is being held in police custody after setting an entire bar on fire. Police reports indicate that the student, Candace Whiteshire (CSOM ‘20), smoked an entire pack of cigarettes before accidentally dropping a still-burning dart... Read more
BCPD Prepares for the Impending Arrival of Florida Man
MALONEY HALL — With the approach of tonight’s matchup against the Miami Hurricanes, most of the Boston College community is ready to wind down the week by enjoying some good ol’ college football. However, the Boston College Police Department (BCPD) has been put on high alert as it prepares... Read more
Student That Took Perspectives, Went On Appa, Arrupe, And Kairos, Then Studied Abroad Has Changed So Much They Exist In The Fourth Dimension Without A Physical Form
IGNACIO HALL — As students across campus are returning from their spring break service trips and preparing to re-enter the daily grind of college life, one senior is notably missing from his dorm. Jesús Christopher (MCAS ’18) was supposed to have returned Saturday from a trip to Whitesburgh, West... Read more
Anxious Junior Worried She Might Step Outside Comfort Zone Abroad
FOSTER STREET — Rachel Weber (MCAS ’19) has been planning her spring semester in Parma, Italy for months now. However, as she begins to think about what her time abroad will bring, the nerves are starting to set in. “I know it will be okay,” explained Weber, who will... Read more
Abroad In Berlin, Addazio To Miss Wake Forest Game
BERLIN — Football head coach Steve Addazio will be missing Saturday’s game after a controversial last-minute decision to study abroad in his fifth year on the Heights. According to The Classic’s international correspondents, the full-figured adventurer has been spotted taking pictures in front of the Berlin Wall and planning... Read more
Junior Receiving College Credit For Four Month Vacation
SOMEWHERE IN EUROPE— Boston College study abroad student Elena Olson (MCAS ‘18) will reportedly receive a full semester of credit for taking a four month vacation, filled with excursions to historic landmarks, museums and picturesque scenery, along with lots of yummy food and long nights of partying. “I’m not... Read more