The New England Classic
Marathon Runner Revived By Pink Whitney Nip
HEARTBREAK HILL – After months of training and relentless Strava posts, Boston Marathon runners are finally gearing up to run for four hours without collapsing or shitting their pants. But the marathon runners aren’t the only ones who’ve been training for this day… Boston College students have been preparing... Read more
Man Cooks Up ALC Showdown Parlay Following Tragic March Madness Bracket Loss

However, once he realized his mistake and discussed the issue with the boys (many of whom had made the same mistake) Swatcher realized that he could use the event to quench his thirst for competition and fuel his ever-present gambling addiction.

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Phew! Pre-Med Man Has Some Advice For Your Period Cramps!

Plainer shared her appreciation: “I never would’ve thought to take Advil for my period. Thank goodness there was a future doctor.”

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UGBC President Signs 17 Executive Orders On First Day of Administration

In line with global political trends, the administration plans to implement projects that, in the words of one genius commentator, “make shit fucking suck even more than it already does”

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Guy Spent 5 Hours On Bracket But 20 Minutes on Group Project

His slides consisted of him ranking freshmen in Gonzaga and Xavier by height because he thought they were playing in the tournament.

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Day In The Life Of A UGBC VP Candidate

I start every morning with affirmations, not for myself, but for the entirety of Foster Street. I shout “You are brave, you are kind, and you are smart” from my rooftop

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Awkward! Pre-Law Student’s Only Job Experience Is Representing Himself In Court

Spictor had gained a reputation on campus for his argumentative prowess and for wearing a tie that was tied like shoelaces. He’s played the devil’s advocate in nearly every class discussion he’s been in.

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FUCK! Marriage Pact Has The Apostrophe After His Class Year In Bio

Lizrowmentic was taken aback. ‘Honestly it wasn’t the quote or the 272:3,400 followers to following ratio, it was the fact that he put the apostrophe in the wrong place of his class year,’ she said.

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Theater Kid Friend Could’ve Gone Broadway If He Hadn’t Torn His ACL

Alas, one fateful day during his senior year production of SpongeBob: The Musical, Threat’s Broadway dreams were shattered when he broke a leg slipping on an unfortunately placed banana peel during final dress rehearsals.

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“It’s Like A Third Leg”—Telltale Signs Of Leahy’s Snow Angel

“Gasson Quad was not untouched: in the middle lay a fresh snow angel, complete with wings, a priest collar, and a tree-trunk sized sleeve jutting from its crotch. “

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