Spooky Archives | The New England Classic

SPOOKY: Chocolate Bar To Hire Ghosts as Seasonal Employees

Holidays Spooky WTF October 29, 2021

STOKES SOUTH — Due to a recent shortage in staffing, Stokes Hall’s beloved Chocolate Bar has been forced to shut down once again. Luckily for cacao- and caffeine-deprived students, BC Dining has announced a plan to dip into the largely unemployed ghost population present at Boston College. When asked about... Read more

Spooky: Someone Did The Dishes and It Wasn’t Me!

Spooky October 28, 2021

“I felt like I had walked into an episode of The Twilight Zone. Only something supernatural could have accomplished what the seven able bodied inhabitants of my 8-man seem incapable of doing.”

SPOOKY! Casper Grew Up, and He’s Anti-Vaxx

Coronavirus Holidays Spooky October 27, 2021

Mr. Ghost began his presentation by calling the Pfizer vaccine “Commy Kool-Aid”, and global lockdowns “nothing more than an attempt to keep old guys like me off the streets.”

SPOOKY: Ghosts Forced To Find New Haunts Because Of Guest Policy Crackdown

Campus Culture Dorm Stuff Spooky October 26, 2021

GONZAGA HALL — While most BC students have been enjoying the newfound freedom of the lenient guest policies this year, one unlucky group of guys and ghouls pushed the boundaries too far this past weekend. Resident Gonzaga ghosts Larry B. Scary and Vincent Van Ghost were haunting the halls as... Read more

SPOOKY: Turtleneck Hides Vampire Bite

School Spooky October 25, 2021

The outbreak began a few weeks ago with the beginning of the new lunar cycle, according to supernatural scholars. “We are very concerned by these latest developments,” said Fr. Donald Callahan. “While the number of infected students is still relatively low, that is more of a sign of the lack of virgins on campus, which is equally troubling.”

5 Signs That Your Sorry Ass Got Dropped From The 8-Man

ResLife Spooky Student Life March 8, 2021

Sadly, much like Julius Caesar or Meghan Markle, many students are about to find themselves stabbed in the back by those they once called friends.

Spooky: Roommate Seriously Considering Sexy RBG Costume

Campus Culture Holidays Spooky October 30, 2020

WALSH HALL — Recent reports from multiple Walsh residents have confirmed that local roommate and VSCO girl Sarah Sleshinger was seriously considering a “sexy RBG” costume for this Halloween. The costume, consisting of only the little white collar-thing and a gavel in the shape of a penis, was purchased... Read more

Spooky: It’s Not Me, It’s You

Spooky Student Life October 29, 2020

“It’s kind of sad, but I really can’t say that I’m to blame.”

Spooky: BC Bookstore Sale Offering 20% Off Your Life Expectancy

Jesuits Spooky Student Life October 27, 2020

I felt a phantasm of my mother’s being beckoning me, like a tether to this corporeal realm, and as she called me back from the darkness, she whispered, ‘Get your father and I “BC Mom and Dad” fleece jackets, sweetie.

Spooky: A Ghost Stole My Red Tab!

Dorm Stuff Spooky October 26, 2020

“The only spirit I know is Holy, and He would never commit such a heinous act.”