Spooky! My Life Sucks Because I Didn’t Send that Text Chain in Sixth Grade
Campus CultureSpooky October 26, 2023
“’It all started when I was twelve, after I ignored a chain text one of my so-called friends sent me. I should have known to take the ghoul’s curse seriously,’ Fortune told the Classic.”
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SPOOKY: Your Boyfriend is a Little TOO Excited to be Ken
Campus CultureHolidaysSpooky October 25, 2023
Halloweekend is almost here, an exciting weekend filled with binge-drinking, slutty little costumes, and an excuse to post yet another photo dump of you and your eight-man on your Instagram! This is also a great weekend to hard-launch your boyfriend of three days with a couples costume, which is exactly what B. Eared (CSON ‘26) is planning on doing with the love of her life, Klaus Ette (MCAS ‘26).
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“Don’t be all uncool and skip out on wearing a costume because I’m being serious when I say EVERYONE wears costumes for Halloween classes.”
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“First thing I noticed were the decorations, them being alive and all I mean,” said Einstein. “The second thing I noticed was that we were all out of Frips.”
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SPOOKY: Blandest Person You Know Going As Maddy From Euphoria For Halloween
Campus CultureSpookyStudent Life October 27, 2022
One young avant-garde, Mary Muhndane (MCAS ’25), was blessed with a stroke of genius with the most original idea to go as Maddy from the little-watched trauma porn, I mean show, Euphoria, on HBO.
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Talherpes soon came to understand that her boyfriend was sending her these candy bags filled with cryptic messages about her sexual health. For Talherpes, the condomgrams quickly lost their shine and became signs of a potential medical emergency.
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Spooky: Someone Did The Dishes and It Wasn’t Me!
Spooky October 28, 2021
“I felt like I had walked into an episode of The Twilight Zone. Only something supernatural could have accomplished what the seven able bodied inhabitants of my 8-man seem incapable of doing.”
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SPOOKY! Casper Grew Up, and He’s Anti-Vaxx
CoronavirusHolidaysSpooky October 27, 2021
Mr. Ghost began his presentation by calling the Pfizer vaccine “Commy Kool-Aid”, and global lockdowns “nothing more than an attempt to keep old guys like me off the streets.”
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