The New England Classic
I’m Not Waking Up At 6 AM Tomorrow To Drink, I’m Waking Up Because This Recipe Takes 12 Hours In The Crockpot
Slow Cooker Baked Beans Total: 12 hr 15 min Active: 5 min Yield: 12 servings Ingredients 1 bag dried navy beans, soaked overnight One 6-ounce can tomato puree 1/2 cup brown sugar  1/4 cup molasses  1 tablespoon dry mustard  8 slices bacon, cut into 1-inch pieces  1 large onion,... Read more
Underground Frat Announces “The Sound And The Fury” As April Book Of The Month
FOSTER STREET – The brothers of Sigma Phi Epsilon, Boston College’s premier and only attempt at Greek life, announced Thursday that William Faulkner’s The Sound and the Fury as the April selection for their monthly book club. This announcement comes on the heels of March’s insightful discussion of Ayn... Read more
Class Clown Takes Snapchat Of Friend From Second Floor Of Lower
CORCORAN COMMONS — Inspiration struck sophomore Tom Wilson Sunday as he sat on the second floor of Corcoran Commons. Wilson exploded onto the Boston College social media scene by snapping a picture of his unsuspecting roommate who was waiting in the checkout line on the first floor. Students report... Read more
Boston College EMS To Cease Kidney Theft Amid Public Outcry
CHESTNUT HILL, MA — Stating that the gruesome habit no longer reflects what the organization stands for, Boston College Emergency Medical Services (BC EMS) reported Monday morning that it will cease stealing the kidneys of inebriated students. While it intends to continue providing hospital transportation and other services for the... Read more
Catholic University Believes In Magic, But Not Gay People
The administration of Boston College, a Jesuit, Catholic university, released a video Thursday which suggests that they believe in magic, but have yet to provide evidence that the university believes in the existence of LGBTQ+ students. Students, tour groups, and Potterheads alike have been drawing comparisons between the architecture... Read more
Mac Expands Vegetarian Options To More Than Just One Leaf
MCELROY COMMONS —  Mike at Mac™ announced Thursday that Carney’s Dining Room, located in McElroy Commons, would be expanding dining options for vegetarian students beyond a single spinach leaf. For decades, Mac has served Boston College students an array of different meal options from Crossroads to Innovations, as long... Read more
Sophomore Wonders: ‘How Loud Do I Need To Sigh In O’Neill For People To Know I’m Pre-Med?’
O’NEILL LIBRARY — After a particularly exhausting day of classes and labs (which are like classes but longer and even more difficult), pre-med student Charlotte Richards (MCAS ’20) retired to the fourth floor of O’Neill hoping for nothing but a little sympathy. Though everyone in her vicinity seemed to be... Read more
Help! Scott From HQ Is Proctoring My Exam!
DEVLIN 008 — Students in Professor James Gallagher’s Globalization II class were met with confusion on Monday when a man that looked like a stretched-out mannequin of a leprechaun stood at the front of the room and proceeded to proctor their open note midterm exam. After the 9 AM... Read more
OPINION: All Of Lower Campus Used To Be A Reservoir. Things Were Better That Way.
Although Lower Campus exists today as the end-all and be-all of social life and high culture at Boston College, things didn’t always used to be this way. Almost 70 years ago, the patch of land immediately east of Main Campus wasn’t land at all, but rather the Lawrence Basin... Read more
Student That Took Perspectives, Went On Appa, Arrupe, And Kairos, Then Studied Abroad Has Changed So Much They Exist In The Fourth Dimension Without A Physical Form
IGNACIO HALL — As students across campus are returning from their spring break service trips and preparing to re-enter the daily grind of college life, one senior is notably missing from his dorm. Jesús Christopher (MCAS ’18) was supposed to have returned Saturday from a trip to Whitesburgh, West... Read more