Spooky! Fifth Friend In Group Gets Assigned A Costume
Lists November 2, 2026 The New England Classic
WALSH HALL — A tale as old as time played out this weekend as notoriously left out and self-proclaimed “9th wheel of the 8-man,” Audrey Wonout (MCAS ’29), returned home from her 4Boston service to learn that her friend group’s Halloween costume had been decided. Due to her convenient absence, her role was pre-assigned by her roommates. Wonout’s assignments were described as “violations of the Geneva Convention” by their residential assistant Josephine “Joe” Verit (CSON ’27). Wonout commented on the situation, saying that “This happens to me every year, and honestly it doesn’t even bother me! I’m just blessed to have a group of girls that loves to include me in whatever way they can!”
To inspire other friend groups with a number problem for their group costume, The New England Classic has compiled a comprehensive list of 20 inclusive group costumes with an extra role for that special friend who you forgot was coming. All options have been tested and sourced from other third, fifth, seventh, and twenty-first wheel friends. The Classic ensured that each individual polled had experienced walking behind a duo on the sidewalk, sitting in the trunk of a half-full car, and holding purses while the group photo was taken.
From Your Letterbox’d
- Grey’s Anatomy: The bus that killed George
- Smurfs: Gargamel
- Friends: Gunther
- Alvin and the Chipmunks and Chipettes: Evil bald guy Ian
- The Lorax: Lowkey hot air delivery guy
- Toy Story: Abused Spider-Babyhead
- Toon Squad: Un-sexy game accurate LeBron James
- Scooby-Doo: The Mystery Machine
- The Hunger Games: Katniss’ nothing-burger mom
- Wicked: Deputy Governor of Public Health for Munchkinland
Spooky Girl Group Favs
- Crayola Colors: Baby shit
- Fast Food: Abandoned Red Lobster
- Sailors and Sirens: Rock with algae
- Holidays: Palm Sunday (sexy)
- Circus: The Animal Welfare Act
- Cereals: Grape-nuts
- French Mimes: Man running a rose scam on the streets
- Pirates: Scurvy
- Party Animals: Sea cucumber
- Angel and Devil: Shoulder
Creative and Cutting Edge
- Dating Apps: Farmers Only
- Social Media: Linkedin
- Boston College Undergraduate Schools: Woods College of Advancing Studies
- Kiss, Mary, Kill: Friendzone.
- Slutty Historical Periods: Mesopotamia (the EXTRA fertile crescent)
Pop Culture Icons
- Jonas Brothers: Frankie
- The Spice Girls: Cumin
- Mario: Diddy Kong
- Disney Princesses: Pocahontas (non-Love-Island-approved edition)
- M&M’S: Obese purple M&M
