Spooky! Guy’s Halloween Costume Leaves Little To The Imagination
Campus CultureHolidaysSpooky November 1, 2026 The New England Classic
WALSH HALL — Amidst an abundance of Kens and Barbies and Berts and Ernies, sophomore Joe Rection proposed a truly unique costume: Drake and Anne Michael Maye. As Temu boxes reached the Walsh mailroom and the costumes came together, Rection and his girlfriend, Suzie Moose (MCAS ’29), donned their jersey and tights and baking apron respectively.
It was not until the pair entered the second-floor common room that the tights revealed their full capabilities. The fabric, rated for “one-size-fits-most,” fit one part of Rection most. Witnesses confirmed the silhouette resembled a twig and berries—a fact that has since been disputed by Rection.
“I wasn’t looking,” said freshman Robert Shitdick, who was dressed as Bert and was definitely looking. “But you can’t unsee a thing like that. It was like the tower of Gasson. You notice it from everywhere on campus.”
Moose, who spent three hours assembling a baking-apron costume, was understandably frustrated. “I told him to wear shorts underneath. I said it twice,” she said. “He even got rid of his underwear at the pregame to ‘give him room to work.’”
Rection stood by his decision, calling the costume “an accurate depiction” and “a bold choice for the 2026 Halloween landscape.”
“Quarterbacks need mobility,” he said, adjusting himself. “I’m committed to the bit. If anything, the tights are a tribute to Boston sports excellence.”
When asked whether he had considered the alternative of pants, Rection said, “Drake wouldn’t.”
Rection has since retired the tights, which were last seen in the Walsh laundry room, in the dryer, on high.
