BC Builds Outdoor Venue For Stoning Sinners And Heretics
Campus CultureJesuitsLeahyStudent Life September 27, 2023
“I’ve seen this campus descend into moral depravity and sin over my career and it’s time we enhanced the judicial processes outlined in the Student Code of Conduct,” said Fr. Leahy. “We need to go back to the good old days when people doing bad things didn’t go through a long systematic trial, and we just stoned them to death. This outdoor venue is exactly for that.”
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“The team comes first! If you really think about it, there’s no ‘I’ in TEAM, but there is in VOMIT.”
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Tour Groups are Back! 10 Projectiles to Throw at Them
Big IssuesCampus CultureLists September 20, 2023
“Let’s Do a Silly One”: Coach Hafley on his Strategy for Upcoming Game
Uncategorized September 15, 2023
When asked to elaborate, Hafley said “You know, like a goofy one. It means you can do whatever you want as long as it’s appropriate! You can stick your tongue out or give someone bunny ears, as long as it doesn’t hurt his feelings.”
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Uh Oh! This Born And Raised New Yorker Is About To Tell The Class What They Think Of The South…
Campus CultureSchool September 14, 2023
‘Once I graduate, I have full intention of moving to the true mixing pot of America: Brooklyn, NY. I’ve never been anywhere near the Mason-Dixon Line, and I have no intention of coming close to it, or the poverty line while I’m at it.’
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“Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion”: How One Confused CSOM Student Thought He Took A Foreign Language Class
Big IssuesSchoolWTF September 13, 2023
It wasn’t until further into the class that he heard the word “equity” and felt safe once again as he believed he was back in the magical land of finance.
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This Guy Wearing Harvard Sweatshirt Wants Everyone To Know He Got Waitlisted
Campus CultureStudent Life September 7, 2023
“‘I got this sweatshirt on my tour of Harvard a couple of years ago, and although Harvard wasn’t the right fit for me in the end, this sweatshirt definitely is'”
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BC Football Gets Sent To Glee Club
Big IssuesFeaturedSports September 6, 2023
At press time, the team was seen rehearsing a rendition of the cupid shuffle and getting slushies thrown in their face by the McKinley High football team.
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“In previous years, we’ve gone for a 50% mud, 50% glass approach”, said CAB Treasurer Lemmy C. Themdogs (MCAS ’23). “It helped to cut costs, but clearly it didn’t help to cut feet. At least not enough for our standards.”
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