“Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion”: How One Confused CSOM Student Thought He Took A Foreign Language Class
FULTON HALL –The add/drop period has finally come to a close and one student spent the last week puzzled about satisfying his core requirements. Having failed his cultural diversity requirement last spring, Chad GeeBeeTee (CSOM ’26) was enrolled in another course that would fulfill it.
GeeBeeTee was living on Google Translate this week after hearing words such as “diversity”, “bias”, and “empathy” which made him believe that he was placed in a foreign language requirement course. When nothing came up for “diversity” in Google Translate, one of GeeBeeTee’s classmates said they heard an audible “HUH?” come from GeeBeeTee followed by concerningly fast typing on his keyboard. GeeBeeTee was seen frantically messaging a contact known only as Mommy, with texts such as:
“Do you remember any Mexican from our trip to Cancun?”
“Did Dad learn anything from when he had to take empathy re-training?”
“Please, Mommy can you write my essays for this class like you did for my First Year Writing Seminar?”
“Diversity” and “inclusion” were completely unfamiliar to GeeBeeTee. Turning to his classmates, GeeBeeTee stated “Bro, can the prof slow down? She’s such a hater.”. Anxious about failing, GeeBeeTee opened up 2048 on his computer to calm his nerves and make himself feel capable of math. It wasn’t until further into the class that he heard the word “equity” and felt safe once again as he believed he was back in the magical land of finance.
GeeBeeTee ultimately decided to drop the course when he discovered attendance was mandatory, AI use in essays was unacceptable, and critical thinking skills were required.