Brad From CSOM: A Day In The Life
SchoolStudent Life November 4, 2021
“I go ham on establishing my 500+ connections on LinkedIn—the primary determinant of my self-worth. It’s also my second-choice dating app, surpassed only by Christian Mingle.”
Read moreSophomore Goes on Retreat for Three Months to Six Years
Student LifeWTF October 21, 2021
“Many students have reported rigorous fingerprinting procedures and are supposedly required to have a session with a Boston-based criminal defense attorney.”
Read moreCircle Tavern “Edgar Allan Poe Night” Offers Chains, Wine, And Cement Special
BostonDrinkingStudent Life October 19, 2021
“I don’t know how anyone could think that a campus-sponsored group would be handing out nude centerfolds to teenage boys.”
Read morePick Me Apple Loves Your Hobbies
Student Life October 8, 2021
“I thought it was pretty suspicious that she liked all the music I like. Seeing as apples don’t even have ears, I didn’t think that it was possible to like modern country-metal with as much passion as I do.”
Read moreClass of 1952 Retakes Superfan Photo, Guy Had His Eyes Closed
SchoolStudent Life September 30, 2021
“Send Stokes Set,” Pleads CAB Anonymously
Campus CultureStudent Life September 17, 2021
CAB spokesperson Kyle Crab (MCAS ’23) responded to the allegations via Instagram story. “We take this sort of allegation very seriously,” wrote Crab of CAB. “With that being said, we’d love to see a lot of heads come out to Stokes Set this weekend so that we can justify not only our exorbitant operating budget but also our outright existence as an organization.”
Read moreProfessor Asks “Just The Ugly Kids” To Mask Up In Class
CoronavirusSchoolStudent Life September 14, 2021
Students expressed widespread indignation Monday when Prof. Patrick Lanzoni requested “just the ugly kids” in his Globalization I class wear masks. The announcement came after Lanzoni lamented seeing “atrocious acne” and “a severe lack of smokeshows” for 2 weeks.
Read moreWeary Sophomores Defend Roncastle From Hordes Of Freshmen
Dorm StuffFreshmenStudent Life September 10, 2021
A righteous group of sophomores, who just months ago found themselves on the rear end of the housing process, fashioned what weaponry they could to protect their dear fortress. Once the freshmen fired their first rock, an all-night war of bloodlust broke out.
Read moreNew CAB Event: Hunt Your Own Dinner
Student LifeWTF April 29, 2021
“I’ve always been, like, super into killing small animals, and it just feels so good to share my passions with the rest of the student body. The BC community is just so supportive, and I am so, so grateful to have this chance to absolutely impale rabbits and other small game with crudely sharpened sticks.”
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