Campus Culture Archives | Page 19 of 24

Five Things To Talk About Now That The Election Is Over, And They’re All The Rat Line

Big Issues Campus Culture School Student Life Uncategorized November 12, 2020

1) The Rat Line I mean, Jesus Christ. The Rat used to MEAN SOMETHING, for pete’s sake. Remind your friends and loved ones how miserable a metaphor the Rat has become for our whole new way of life. The Rat is, as it has always been, the center of... Read more

Six Polite Ways To Get Your Roommates To Stop Listening To Christmas Music Before Thanksgiving

Campus Culture Holidays November 10, 2020

“Have your roommates already started listening to Christmas music? If you answered ‘yes’ or ‘possibly’ or ‘I CANNOT THINK STRAIGHT ENOUGH TO READ THIS BECAUSE THAT CATCHY SNOWMISER/HEATMISER SONG FROM The Year Without a Santa Claus IS ALREADY STUCK IN MY HEAD,’ we have you covered with six polite ways to get your roommates to stop playing Christmas music so early.”

10 Nasty Things About Jeff Hafley That We Just Made Up

Campus Culture Sports November 6, 2020

THE NEC NEWSROOM, ONTARIO, CANADA — Now folks, if we may, we’d like to be straight with you for a moment. Here at The New England Classic, we’ve made a killing on the gaffes Boston College’s top people make each day. But god damn it, we just can’t find... Read more

OP-ED: A Perfectly Normal Tuesday

Campus Culture Featured Opinion November 3, 2020

Well, I can’t seem to explain it really — compared to the commotion of most others days so far, today’s shaping up to be about as perfectly ordinary as it gets. Perhaps I should elaborate. My alarm went off at seven, as it usually does. I snoozed it just... Read more

Spooky: Roommate Seriously Considering Sexy RBG Costume

Campus Culture Holidays Spooky October 30, 2020

WALSH HALL — Recent reports from multiple Walsh residents have confirmed that local roommate and VSCO girl Sarah Sleshinger was seriously considering a “sexy RBG” costume for this Halloween. The costume, consisting of only the little white collar-thing and a gavel in the shape of a penis, was purchased... Read more

Spooky: Mike@Mac Is Your New Stepdad

Campus Culture Student Life October 28, 2020

McELROY COMMONS— Senior Stephen Kelly (‘21) got more than he paid for at his most recent trip to McElroy Commons. Kelly, who usually frequents Lower Dining Hall or his own 2150 Kitchen, found himself in the Upper campus eatery to grab a quick chicken and two sides after his... Read more

Pumpkin Sues BC EMS For Botched Surgery

Campus Culture Spooky Student Life October 22, 2020

GABELLI HALL — Dreams of a blissful thot-umn were thrown into uncertainty when news broke that Doctorina Miami (CSON ‘22), Vice President of Boston College EMS, was being sued for medical malpractice and emotional distress by a pumpkin she carved earlier this week. “I was just trying to be... Read more

Op-Ed: I Am Madly In Love With The Single Weird Tiny Fully Finished Piece of The Schiller Center

Campus Culture Sex October 21, 2020

For weeks, I’d spend my days sitting in its shadow telling it about my day or just admiring its smooth, supple stone and powerful frame. The courageous independence of its existence.

Fuckboy Would Date You If It Weren’t For “Everything Going on Right Now”

Campus Culture Coronavirus Sex October 19, 2020

“Marley later clarified that he does not believe COVID-19 will impact his ability to hook up with you, just his emotional availability. As Boston College cracked down on the number of guests allowed in each place of residence, Marley felt it was only right to enforce a strict no-sleepover policy at his place starting Saturday. “

Op-Ed: A Perfectly Normal Day

Campus Culture School October 15, 2020

Happy Thursday, October 15, Boston College! Boy, isn’t today normal? The first thing I did after getting out of bed was brush my teeth with a little Colgate®️ Optic White toothpaste. Then, I took my morning shower and changed into a casual outfit. To finish off my morning routine,... Read more