Opinion: Strip Mod Must Go On, Even If It’s a Private Little Show Just For Me
Throughout the fall semester, far too many beloved Boston College traditions have been postponed, doomed to rot on the shelf until further notice. But if I could make a plea to ensure one tradition continues this semester, it would be this: Strip Mod must go on, even if it’s a private little show just for me.
Some fools may reason that of all the traditions in Chestnut Hill, Strip Mod is one of the least important. “It’s not like it’s a football tailgate or the CAB Christmas tree lighting,” some ignorant souls might argue. Meanwhile, other prudes would claim that they “didn’t even go last year, and won’t give it a second thought this year.”
To these naysayers I say: you’re wrong. Strip Mod is not just a tradition, it’s an institution. If we lose touch with this institution, we run the great risk of losing ourselves. The University often talks about cura personalis. If we are truly to care for the whole person, what better way than by allowing the students, who have endured so much this semester, to enjoy one magical evening watching the boys of Mods 27A and B dance sensually while stripping layer by layer, all culminating in a glorious finale in which they frolic around in nothing but their cute, tight little briefs?
Of course, I’m well aware of all the risks that come with a large crowd gathering to watch Strip Mod in the midst of a pandemic. Should we decide the risk is simply too great to gather en masse, I believe it is my solemn duty to offer my services to ensure this time-honored tradition lives on with a private little show, just for me.
To the boys of Mods 27A and B: while I won’t be able to match the energy level that comes with hundreds of students gathering in your backyard, I promise to do my best to ensure you still receive the utmost attentiveness from the audience which you so dearly deserve. Given the current state of the world, I promise to stay six feet away, wear a mask at all times, and just sit quietly in the corner, staring intently and taking it all in. You won’t even know I’m there.
The burden of being the only to enjoy the show will not be an easy one, but I cannot imagine anyone else being more qualified to make the sacrifice. Ever since the conclusion of last year’s Strip Mod, not a day has gone by in which I haven’t fantasized about this year’s performance. The smooth, oiled up skin. The provocative little shakes of your tight little rear ends. The rush of a crotch coming oh so close to my face, only a thin layer of Hanes-manufactured cotton separating us. I was made to take on this challenge, and I will not let the institution of Strip Mod fade silently into the horny night.