WTF Archives | Page 3 of 12 | The New England Classic

Liz Cheney Found Searching Through Upper Dorms, Claims To Find Weapons of Mass Destruction

Big Issues Campus Culture WTF October 28, 2024

WHEREVER THE OIL IS — Former U.S. Representative Liz Cheney is set to speak at the Council for Women at Boston College Colloquium as part of her national tour to make everyone forget the actions of her father, aptly named former Vice President of the United States and Emperor-elect... Read more

Guy You Hooked Up With Just Discovered The Term “Avoidant Attachment Style”

Sex WTF October 18, 2024

Despite him initiating all forms of intimacy, admitting he has feelings first, and also introducing his parents and peepaw to her at parents’ weekend, Manny Pulator, (CSOM ’26) decided to call things off as he was mid-thrust.

Uh Oh! The Professor Whose Class You’re Failing Sat Next to You in the Sauna!

Big Issues WTF October 7, 2024

“But then–lurking from the shadows, my financial accounting professor [Bill Incesheet (CSOM ‘88)] situated his half-naked ass next to me, fresh off a cold call in class, to which I responded with a stuttered mumble and some lightly shat pants.”

Freshman Submits First Paper In Comic Sans, Claiming It Adds Character

Big Issues Freshmen WTF October 2, 2024

“Each font has a different story, and that’s, like, so cool. I just love the visual artistry of it all,” said Turner, who left her entire paper formatted in a single paragraph.

Girl Is Pregnant, According To Spanish Class Oral Exam

School Student Life WTF September 23, 2024

Barazado was seen with a dewy, jovial glow about her as she left Stokes Hall, a clear sign of pregnancy and definitely not the Drunk Elephant bronzing drops she steals from her roommate sometimes when she feels pale.

Gassy Gasson Renovations, Bells Ring When Someone Passes Gas

Big Issues Campus Culture WTF September 16, 2024

Originally set for every quarter of the hour, the bells now ring every time someone passes gas. Even worse, an announcement echoes throughout the halls, sharing the name of who dealt it with the entire campus.

Impossible! Guy With 1000 LinkedIn Connections Has No Emotional Support Network

Student Life WTF September 12, 2024

Since orientation, Enn has been harassing drunk CSOM students at Walsh parties, any man wearing an expensive toupee, and his acquaintance’s friend’s brother’s dog’s cat’s mailman’s dentist’s 3rd cousins (twice removed) in a near lustful urge to obtain a LinkedIn connection.

“Party In The modes!” Says Eager Calculator Stuck In Radian Mode

Campus Culture Sports WTF September 9, 2024

Popular Boston College meme, “Party in the modes,” was shared over 1,000 times that day, but no one was as excited to party in the modes as Cal Culator (MCAS 2025).

LTE From The Moon Club President

Campus Culture LTE WTF April 8, 2024

Everyone won’t shut up about summer and tanning and blah blah blah. Who fucking cares! Get some sun on the quad on a different day, I just want to get high in the afternoon and watch that shit cover the sun. Stay pale, I literally dare you.

LTE: I’m T-pain, You Know Me–T-Pain Wrote This Article

Campus Culture LTE WTF March 19, 2024

I’m T-Pain, you know me! What’s your name? Let me talk to ‘em!