Awesome! My Donation To Ecopledge Was Actually For Custom Embroidered Parke Sweatshirts
Campus Culture November 8, 2026 The New England Classic
THE END TIMES — On this crisp 77-degree November day, there are three types of Boston College students: liberal extremists who are lamenting the climate crisis, popular people soaking in the sun, and liberal extremists who also happen to like soaking in the sun. Despite the challenges of addressing the climate crisis, The New England Classic is happy to report on real, tangible, and revolutionary student activism on campus: Ecopledge just got new Parke sweatshirts!
Boston College club-branded sweatshirts demonstrate students’ status and acceptance into an exclusive group. Walking to the Rat after failing a career-defining exam, you’re likely to be accosted by students in Charity Water, Ecopledge, or Project Smile alike, begging you to donate to their causes. However, investigative reporting by the Classic has found that 67% of the funds raised by these pie-facing stands, lemonade sales, and candy deliveries is used for club-branded Parke sweatshirts. While these organizations mean well, this funding allocation is certainly questionable.
The Classic caught up with the treasurer of Charity Water, Dianna Hydrajen-Monaside (CSOM ’28) who said, “Being treasurer is a big responsibility! Between the custom embossing on our Owalas and peppermint Svedka for haircuts, our budget is spread real thin.” She continued, “To solve our deficit problem, we have been finding unique ways to generate revenue.”
Outside of selling pins and sending Venmo requests to their members’ boyfriends for “Plan B,” Ecopledge president, Nucleo Enerji (MCAS ’27) has taken inspiration from her Environmental Ethics courses to pioneer new forms of funding for Ecopledge. First, she created a handful of shell companies and attracted donations of several countries, businesses, and foreign actors. She then formed a super PAC, accepting donations from these shell companies through opaque middlemen—501(c)(4) nonprofits. Finally, through millions of dollars in political spending, she influenced local, national, and international elections to reduce environmental regulations on cocoa plantations. This reduced the costs associated with creating the baked goods sold at Ecopledge’s annual bake sale, allowing for higher profit margins. Enerji told the Classic, “Once I did all that, the Parke sweatshirts were lowkey affordable!”
Despite these critiques, The New England Classic (an organization that has donated exactly $0 to charity) celebrates the 33% of club fundraising that does go to fighting climate change, building water infrastructure, and bringing smiles to children’s faces. All charitable work, even if imperfect, is admirable. In a world of Circle™ sweatshirts, wear that Project Smile x Parke merch with pride! 
