Freshman Boy Disappointed By Lack Of Shaw-ties In The Shaw House
Dorm StuffFreshmenSex October 3, 2025 The New England Classic
THE ANIMAL HOUSE OF UPPER CAMPUS — Every year, hundreds of incoming Boston College freshmen scour Facebook, Instagram, and Craigslist alike to find roommates and plan housing arrangements. Another alluring option offered are the many Living Learning Communities that exist, such as the Kappa Kappa Kostka Women’s Experience, and the Perspectives Circle-Jerking Community on Newton.
One of these options stands out: The Shaw Leadership Program. The program invites freshmen who believe they are better than the rest to live in the prestigious “Shaw House” of Upper Campus. Over the years, legends have built up about what goes on inside those walls: cocaine benders, ragers, orgies… All the hottest, most over-achieving, self proclaimed “leaders” all in one place, how could it not be a blast?
According to Dave Needsdis (SSW ‘27) Graduate Minister of Cheverus Hall, “On the street, all the hottest girls at BC are called ‘Shaw-tys.’”
“I mean that’s why I applied,” said Fred Keyboy (CSOM ‘28), “I knew if I wanted to be the most ferda boy at BC, I had to live in the ‘touse.’ I want the freakiest, most overachieving chicks and I wanna live in close quarters with them.”
Keyboy was accepted into the house, and now says “I feel like I’m living in a gay ass student council meeting. The first girl I met rides horses, and not in the way I was hoping. She just smells like shit all the time. The other girls are all either in long-term relationships or don’t hookup with Protestants. My options are slim.”
When asked if Keyboy would be staying in Shaw for the rest of the year, he sighed and answered, “I already soft-launched moving to a different dorm. I’m ready to go get sendy in Claver, but I still gotta do all this leadership shit.” 
