Heroic ROTC Sophomore Won’t Stop Calling Going Abroad “Getting Deployed”
AbroadWTF February 21, 2025 The New England Classic
MAN’S LAND — Hailing from central New Jersey, Lewis Tennant (CSON ‘27) is a self-proclaimed proud member of Boston College’s Reserve Officer Training Corps (ROTC) Freedom-Unity-Command-Knighthood Unit (FUCK-U). Holding both the rank of 3rd Class Staff Sergeant Command Major and a 2.1 GPA, Lewis has been described as a “model soldier” who is “earnestly patriotic” and “plentily girthy”. Tennant was one of the many Boston College sophomores who recently received his study abroad placement, or as he’s been calling it: deployment.
The Classic caught up with Tennant in his Vandy 8-man, or “HQ”, just one day after he learned of his placement at the University of Learnenschoolen in Switzerland.
“If the free world needs me to be stationed in Switzerland, then by God I’ll be there, Sir!” said Tennant.
While Googling “average bench press switzahland,” “how to stay straight in ureupe,” and “how many terrorists switzurland?” Tennant explained his plans “to liberate the commies.”
“Y’know how most people are annoying after they study abroad?” said Tennant’s roommate Sikka Disshit (CSOM ’27), while bumming a cigarette. “Yeah, Lewis is somehow already getting on my nerves with it. He won’t stop calling it ‘getting deployed to the East’ and when I asked what program he got into, he said it was ‘classified’ then slapped me.”
Disshit, who has tolerated his living partner for nearly two years, further explained how the “whole ROTC thing” has always been a nuisance: “He set his alarm to sound like military trumpets. Do you know how hard it is to tune that out?”
Still, Tennant has been taking his deployment very seriously. He has already started preparations for his Swiss deployment.
“The main thing is communication with the locals,” said Tennant. “I nearly got a 10 day streak on my Duolingo Swedish lessons.”
In addition to learning “the native tongue,” Tennant has also been practicing other key military skills such as wearing baseball caps with skulls on them, changing his instagram profile picture to him in a helmet, and saluting his professors.
At press time, Tenant was seen doing pushups on Stokes lawn in a too-small green shirt.
