The New England Classic
Athlete Scoots Home For The Holidays Due To Surge In Flight Prices

Athlete Scoots Home For The Holidays Due To Surge In Flight Prices

HolidaysWTF November 22, 2021 The New England Classic

However, after a stroke of inspiration while scooting to his finance class, Speedster has decided to do what no other Boston College Athlete has... Athlete Scoots Home For The Holidays Due To Surge In Flight Prices

WALSH HALL — After neglecting to book a flight home until the last day before break, sophomore Scott Speedster (CSOM ’24) found himself hopeless about going home for the holidays. The flights from Boston to his home in Tampa, Florida average currently at around $500, and for any broke college student, that is simply not in their budget.

However, after a stroke of inspiration while scooting to his finance class, Speedster has decided to do what no other Boston College Athlete has done: scoot on home for the holidays. “Yeah I mean this bad boy can get me to Playa Bowls and back, why can’t I scoot to Florida?” Speedster told The Classic while slapping the handles of his scooter, “I’ll charge it up the night before I leave to make sure I can get the optimal MPH on this beauty.”

Roommate of Speedster, Conner Cerned (MCAS ’24), expressed his worries saying “I don’t think he realizes that by the time he gets to Florida, he’ll just have to turn around and scoot back to Massachusetts. But I don’t really want to burst his bubble- yesterday he bought a motorcycle helmet and goggles in preparation for his journey, and he’s been showing it to every girl who walks by trying to impress them. He even asked one to ride on the back of the scooter with him all European-style.” The girl, who chose to remain anonymous, revealed that she declined the offer.

Speed nevertheless has full faith in his mode of transportation, and mansplained to The Classic that “The laws of the highway require all vehicles to be motor vehicles, and well, I have a motor vehicle. There really shouldn’t be an issue with me scooting home for Thanksgiving dinner.”

At press time, Speed was seen packing a picnic basket full of PB and Js to snack on during his trek.