Embarrassed Psych Major Didn’t Do Palm Reading For Today
MCGUINN HALL — Disaster struck on Tuesday when it came to light that Lauren Franklin (MCAS ‘20) neglected to complete her required palm reading for PSYC304002, Advanced Applied Human Psychology. During the class’s regular 10:00 AM meeting, Franklin failed to answer basic questions about the length of her subject’s life and his future occupation.
Franklin’s professor, Dr. Ozymandias Grant, expressed surprise at Franklin’s disregard, noting that “her dream interpretations were always thorough and on-time,” and he was “generally impressed by her commitment to the divine arts.”
Franklin’s friends seemed concerned as well. “She’s been getting really into herbal teas and absinthe lately,” explained roommate Carolyn Wilson (CSON ‘20). “We feel like it’s really been affecting her work ethic.”
Franklin declined to give The Classic any comment. Efforts to reach out to her third eye were unsuccessful as well.
At press time, Franklin was seen searching for online tarot card translations on Chegg.