Inbred Piece Of Human Garbage Wears White After Labor Day
GASSON QUAD — Tommy Michelson (MCAS ’19) was spotted lounging on the Gasson Quad with his roommates today sporting a pair of white Vineyard Vines shorts. Does that dumb bitch not know that yesterday was Labor Day?
Michelson, usually a perfectly presentable dresser, seemed blissfully ignorant of his fashion faux pas as he drew stares from passersby all over campus.
“I mean, we had the day off from school, right? Like, he had to know that yesterday was Labor Day,” theorized senior Jenny Pace, a classmate in Michelson’s 9:00 AM Introduction to Theatre class.
Whether his outfit choice was a simple lapse in judgment or a willful dismantling of social norms, the consensus of the Boston College student body seems clear: someone needs to tell this fuckin’ moron to go home and change.