It is the time when all the suits come out to play!
Hark, my children! Grab your neckties and button your cuffs, for it is suit time. Yessir, we’ve waited many a fortnight but it has finally come: the time when all the suits come out to frolic on the Quad. Don’t be caught looking like some schlub, run home right now and grab your biggest blazer before the hour of fancy pants has come and gone. Anyone who doesn’t wear a suit for Suitsmas won’t be allowed to fuck for 100 years.
It’s been oh-so-long but now it has finally arrived. All the suit boys and girls will sing their suit-time tune as they don their dapper digs and prepare for the appointed hour. Soon will come the suit parade, when all the besuited will march across campus, as the onlookers piss themselves with joy. Finally, Suitman Sam will come and give a golden cuff-link to his shiny suit son, and the two will hop on their motorcycles and wheelie into oncoming traffic.
Tarry not, for the hour draws nigh, soon will come the age of pleated pants and shiny shoes. What a glorious Suitsmas it shall be!