Comm. Ave Bus Flipped As Sox Fans Destroy City They Love
COMMONWEALTH AVE. — On Sunday night, Boston College’s Red Sox fans celebrated the team’s World Series victory against the L.A. Dodgers. As the game came to a close, the boys on the eighth floor of Walsh cooked up the most genius play of the night.
“Bros, how wild would it be if we, like, went into Boston right now?” asked Spencer Reed (CSOM ’21).
After finishing off his Sam Adams Boston Lager,* Reed got out of his LoveSac, purchased from Jordan’s Furniture,** and roused his roommates. After another half hour, the bus finally arrived at Robsham and the boys climbed on, still finishing off their leftover slices from Regina Pizzeria.***
By the time the bus arrived at the Reservoir MBTA Station, it was 1:15 AM. The boys began unloading, but soon noticed that the station was closed for the night. Disappointed and upset, Reed proposed a different idea.
“Why don’t we just flip this bus over right now?” he said. “That’ll make us feel like we’re there.”
The boys listened dutifully to their captain. Backlit by the multitude of fires burning in Kenmore Square, the young heroes triumphantly toppled the bus. With the damage done, they returned to campus, excited to end the night sharing stories of their adventure over some Hoodsie Cups.****
At press time, the bus driver was seen rocking back and forth at the T stop, sobbing and chanting, “Fuck the Yankees!”
*The Official Beer of the Boston Red Sox
**The Official Furniture Store of the Boston Red Sox
***The Official Pizza Of The Boston Red Sox
****The Official Ice-Cream Snack Of The Boston Red Sox