Inspiring: Freethinking Roommate Doesn’t Have A TikTok
RONCALLI HALL — According to multiple sources, local freethinker Andy Smith (MCAS ’23) does not have TikTok, leaving several of his roommates in awe. Details of Smith’s bravery came to light last Friday when he drunkenly complained that TikTok “is an app for idiots,” and said that its users should “consume something with meaning, like Nietzche.”
Smith, a self-proclaimed “intellectual,” became an outspoken critic of the video-sharing platform when the acclaimed documentary The Social Dilemma was recommended to him through Netflix’s sophisticated algorithm. The film, which criticizes tech companies for their sophisticated algorithms, inspired Smith to speak out about his disdain for the app.
“‘Baa, baa’ says you, the sheep. Flocking along, with no concern for life nor death. You fools. I triumph while you stare into your screens and worship your little dancers and lip syncers — the absolute fools of the world. I used to be like you, but no longer. For I was blind, but now I see,” Smith told the Classic.
Smith was not alone in expressing his opinion on the subject. “I read a study from MIT the other day that said it takes approximately the same amount of time to watch a TikTok as it does to put on one sock,” said psychology major Candi Scending (MCAS ‘23). “In other words, instead of watching twenty TikToks, one could put on twenty socks or perhaps even 21 or 22 if said person moves hurriedly, you stupid, stupid idiots.”
Despite being avid TikTokers themselves, Smith’s friends are reportedly inspired by his unabashed hatred towards the seemingly harmless app.
“I enjoy being told that the things I like are stupid,” says Smith’s roommate, Charles DiEmilio (LSOE ’23). “Especially from someone like Andy, who is so clearly better than me.”
At press time, Smith was seen complaining to his roommates he was “miserable and bored.”