REPORT: Fun Roommate Not In Room
Dorm StuffStudent Life February 20, 2019 The New England Classic
LOWER CAMPUS — Walsh Hall resident William Welch (MCAS ’21) fell victim to the old switcheroo on Wednesday when he entered his common room to find that his fun roommate was not in the room.
“Oh man, I thought Adam would be in here,” Welch said. “I sorta wish he was. Damn.”
After coming to the conclusion that his beloved roommate Adam Rider (MCAS ’21) was indeed absent from the communal living area of the eight-man, Welch sighed and walked back to his bedroom.
Five minutes later, he came back out “just to double check” that Rider was not in his usual spot, “Juuling under the Pink Floyd poster.”
Welch is not the only member of Walsh 312 who values Rider’s presence. Davie Scatino (CSOM ’21) agreed that their English major roommate “truly brings the chill” into the common room.
“Adam is great,” said Scatino. “I mean, he does use a little ketamine and fentanyl from time to time, but it’s really just his personality. Naturally energetic and fun, you know?”
Rider’s absence couldn’t have come at a worse time for Welch. The economics major had invited his Macro classmate Joe Connors (MCAS ’21) back to the suite partially so he could be impressed with and entertained by Rider.
“I mean, I don’t know Joe that well, and I don’t want him to think I’m just some boring loser stuck with a bunch of bums,” Welch said. “For Christ’s sake, Matt sure isn’t helping either.”
Welch assured his guest that Matt Marsh (MCAS ’21), the suitemate who spends at least four hours a day playing Halo in the living room, was “just kind of an add-on we took so we could get an eight-man” and “kind of a loser.”
“Let me just text Adam and see what’s he’s up to, man,” Welch told his peer to reassure him, promising it would be both “dope” and “epic.”
At press time, Welch was seen tearing through Rider’s drawers in search of prescription Adderall.
