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BC Marble Spillers And Banana Peelers Club Banned From Marathon

Boston Drinking October 10, 2021

CARNEY HALL—While BC is renowned for uplifting and celebrating its student clubs, OSI has placed restrictions on the “Marble Spillers and Banana Peelers” club. From Sunday, 7 P.M. to Monday, 7 P.M., members of the club are not allowed within 20 feet of Commonwealth Avenue. “It’s a safety risk,”... Read more

Students Storm Field After Beating Newton North 24-20

Campus Culture Drinking WTF September 29, 2021

“We’re confident that that will translate well to this week’s matchup at Clemson. In a lot of ways, Newton North and Clemson have very similar defensive styles.”

“BC Before Dark” To Offer Sippy Cups For Little Stupid Babies Who Can’t Drink

Campus Culture Drinking April 12, 2021

“For the first time in a long time, I feel seen,” said Smalls Gerber (MCAS ’22)”

LTE: The Rat Can Still Be A Bar If You Day Drink There

Drinking Featured LTE March 16, 2021

I’ve heard about the glory days of 1978, when The Rat was the most bodacious, tubular joint in town to shake your thing and meet some bitchin’ lads and ladies. Legend says the drinking age was 18, that light beer flowed as though a gift from the gods, and... Read more

University Suspends Three Persons of God for Violating Guest Policy

Coronavirus Dorm Stuff Drinking October 5, 2020

“After we stuffed the Holy Spirit behind the shower curtain, I tried to explain that we’re Three Persons, One God, so we should be exempt… they couldn’t seem to grasp the concept. BC is really going to regret doing this. Do they know who my Father is?”

Junior Canonized After Rising From The Dead At Pregame

Drinking Student Life November 5, 2019

FOSTER STREET – Pope Francis announced Monday that Mike McMackey (CSOM ‘21) will be officially canonized as a Catholic saint. The Boston College junior performed his third miracle this weekend when he resurrected himself from the dead in the basement of 295 Foster Street. The 20-year-old grandson of four... Read more

Columbus Attempts To Discover The Mods, Finds Walsh Instead

Drinking Holidays October 17, 2019

Christopher Columbus (University of Bologna ‘92) made a critical error this past Monday when he attempted to go to the Mods for a party but ended up at Walsh Hall instead. Columbus reportedly received word of multiple parties happening at the Mods and decided to head west in search... Read more

Total Plug: Dad Gives Sophomore Sip Of Beer During Game

Drinking Sports Student Life September 30, 2019

ALUMNI FIELD — Underage sophomore Harry “Heavyweight” Holmes had his entire weekend made when his cool father agreed to share a sip of his beer with him at the game on Saturday. After tailgating in the Robsham parking lot, where eyewitnesses claim they saw Heavyweight sneaking some drinks behind... Read more

Not Again: Eagle Escort Actually The Cash Cab

Drinking Freshmen April 8, 2019

CAMPANELLA WAY — Three freshmen watched their night go from bad to worse on Saturday as their travel plans took an unexpected turn for the trivial. Piling into what they believed to be an Eagle Escort van, the members of the trio had no idea that they had just... Read more

Well-Intentioned Douchebag Kinda Wishes He Went On Appa Instead Of Drinking For 7 Days

Drinking Service Student Life March 10, 2019

RUBENSTEIN HALL — Returning to campus Sunday afternoon, senior Joe McCaffery reflected on his week-long spring break vacation to Punta Cana. His vacation included drinking by the pool, lounging on the beach while drinking, and staring into his drink after losing money at the casino. Though he “straight up... Read more