The New England Classic
CSOM Students Search “What’s Going On In Ukraine Right Now” Following Commencement Speaker Announcement

However, one quick google search informed Owt that Ukraine is in fact not a new peer-to-peer lending platform, but rather a nation state that is being viciously and unjustly invaded by neighboring Russia.

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Film Bro Adds Chemistry Panopto To His Letterboxd

After a long and strenuous chemistry lecture, hundreds of students fled a packed Devlin 008. While most students were crying over the upcoming test, or scribbling down the last words uttered by the professor, one student, Pret Entious (MCAS ’25) was spotted doing something completely different: rating the lecture on his prized Letterboxd account. 

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Slimiest Guy You Know Works For Eagles Realty Now
MCELROY COMMONS– In today’s modern labor market, the true “9-5” may be going out of business. Replacing it are a slew of recently popularized streams of passive income. Students at BC are determined to not be left behind in the obsolete 9-5 world, and are constantly looking for ways... Read more
“We’re Actually Pretty Middle Class” Says Kid Whose Parents Started The War In Iraq
GASSON HALL– The core curriculum, a cornerstone of Boston College’s educational pedagogy, offers many students the unique opportunity to discover that people have lived experiences. Professors often ask students to consider and share how their identities impact their lives.  Overwhelmed by his peers sharing their identities and experiences that... Read more
Friend Whose Dad Works At McKinsey Is “Also Worried” About Postgrad

O’Baby, who has been to the Turks and Caicos 14 times and spent a summer interning for former President Barack Obama, denies that her father’s position has afforded her any extra opportunities.

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Super Generous Boyfriend Shares His Love With Multiple Women

For the lucky few who survived the 2022-2023 cuffing season, love is in the air this week! And for a couple of BC women, one man will spread romance, legs, and an unquenchable burning sensation all week long.

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Gasson Exhibiting Signs Of Napoleon Complex After Arrival Of Much Taller Crane

“That big ole nerd? He stink. Nobody like crane,” replied Gasson in a clear exhibition of its newly developed Napoleon complex.

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Receipt Reveals That Student Actually Did Order A Side Of Bug
MCELROY COMMONS — Public scrutiny of Boston College Dining Services (BCDS) is higher than ever after student Damie J’Ambra (MCAS ’25) found a giant black bug in their meal. After a photo of the bug was published and quickly became viral on Monday, many students were questioning what BCDS... Read more
Due To Warm Weather, UCS Starts Support Group For Canada Goose Owners

“This warm weather has gotten really concerning lately,” said Sue Warm (CSOM ’25). “It shouldn’t be 65 degrees in November– it’s just not natural. We are biologically inclined to be wearing our Canada Goose jackets at this time of the year. Repressing this instinct is making us all feel super depressed. I’m so depressed, I’ve only been using Olaplex steps 3-5. I’m too depressed to even use steps 6-9.”

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Poli Sci Student From Swing State Protests Voting: “It’s Too Much Work”

That student is Political Science major Demi Crocy (MCAS ’25). “Yeah, the country has gone to shit in the past few years, but you have to weigh the benefits and the costs. One walk to the mail room could be what I consider ‘worth the effort,’ but then I would have to walk to another mailbox after I filled out my ballot. Think about it. Is it really worth it?”

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