The New England Classic
Fuck It: We Ranked All The Books Of The Bible That We Could Remember Offhand
JOHN Okay, we all know THIS is the best Bible. It has Jesus, Jesus’ little pals, and even two fish! We will award John $25 to Home Depot. DEUTERONOMY Uh-Oh! Dirty Bible! We remember this Bible because it is little more than a filthy carnival of the uncouth, and... Read more
Laundry Pile Becomes Sentient, Asks “What Are We?”
IGNACIO HALL — Senior Rachel Anthony had the shock of a lifetime on Wednesday morning when her three-week-old laundry pile questioned her about the status of their relationship. The laundry pile had been slowly growing under her bed for the last 21 days, and now was ready to define... Read more
8 Things UGBC Candidates Aren’t Talking About
With UGBC presidential elections coming up fast, the candidates have still not addressed the questions that we really care about, so we’ve compiled this list of topics and questions that we think the candidates have egregiously overlooked. 1) The destruction of the Meatball Obsession Stand. A year later, we... Read more
Martin Jarmond Kills Baldwin, Replaces With Baby Baldwin
Like what you see? Get yer fixin’ with our Spring Print Edition, coming to a silent library near you! Read more
New Children’s Book Space Opens in O’Neill for CSOM Students
O’NEILL LIBRARY — Boston College Libraries introduced a new space for students in the Carroll School of Management in which they can peruse children’s books on days when they don’t have homework, which is most days. The new room on the fifth floor of the library, called the Profit... Read more
History Major Finds Success At Renaissance Fair
MARGOT CONNELL RECREATION CENTER — Disgruntled history major, Andrew Llyod-Webber (MCAS ’21), found unanticipated success during the Career Fair this afternoon. After printing out his resume and and placing it neatly in a folder, Webber made his way from his off-campus residence to the Margot Connell Recreation Center, but... Read more
Mods Turn 50, Still Dating 21-Year-Old
THE MODULARS — The temporary housing units known as the ‘Mods’, beloved by seniors and yearned after by freshmen, celebrate their fiftieth birthday this year.  The Mods are often featured on Instagram and other forms of social media, and recently a picture of them with Kelly O’Brian (LOSE ’21),... Read more
Uh Oh: Guy With Circle Glasses Wants To Talk About The Oscars
McGUINN HALL — Thursday’s 10:15 Globalization II lecture took a turn when Annie McHugh (MCAS ’22) braced herself for a discussion with classmate Quintin Ford (MCAS ’20) on the upcoming Academy Awards. Ford, who strolled in five minutes early smelling of Old Spice and cigarette smoke, immediately began launching... Read more
CAB Offering $20 Kohls Cash To Boston City Limits Attendees
For more timely, gripping, and mustard-slathered content, look out for our end of semester print issue. Read more
Five Reasons You Should Skip Class and Watch the Construction Men, Hard At Work In Their Big Trucks
Class is only fun when movies. Usually teacher will only talk about stuff that is boring and makes me exhausted. Most of the time I am not listening because I am too busy thinking about trucks. But if there is YouTube or movie I will probably pay attention though.... Read more