Creators of Club Club Lacrosse Announce Model Model UN
VANDERSLICE HALL — After months of speculation, the group of BC juniors responsible for the Club Club Lacrosse team announced Monday the formation of “Model Model UN”.
The founders hope that just like Club Club Lacrosse, Model Model UN will be a great outlet for kids whose identity was entirely wrapped up in one thing in high school but aren’t actually very good at it.
“These kids really fucking suck at Model UN,” explained one of the club’s founders, Jenn Eva (MCAS ‘23).
In one committee focused on debating the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, three of the committee’s five delegates somehow all represented the Soviet Union. The other two claimed allegiance to Transylvania.
“We know there’s a lot of work to do, but this is a great start,” said club co-founder Jack Duquette (CSOM ’22). “Except for the Transylvania kids. Those guys have no shot. They have to go.”
In a committee addressing the existential threat of climate change, nobody had the heart to tell the delegate from Germany that he was using a thick Italian accent the whole time.
“It was tough to watch,” said the delegate from Mesopotamia, Sam Siegler (MCAS ’22). “It became clear pretty early on that he didn’t know the difference between Italy and Germany.”
Despite a few hiccups in the first meeting, Model Model UN’s leaders are hopeful for the future. The first step, they say, is making sure everybody represents a real country. After that, the sky is the limit for Model Model UN.
At press time, the Model Model UN Security Council was seen arguing over the merits of accepting a sponsorship deal for its most famous document, renaming it the “Lockheed Martin™ Universal Declaration of Human Rights”.